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How often do you lose your temper and say things you wish you hadn't? Do you end an argument not even knowing why you were so angry to begin with? If you answered yes, then you are not alone. In this article, we will help you gain clarity about the cause of your anger and teach you techniques that will support you, as well as the ability to pause and think about what you say before blurting it out. Continue reading to discover three steps you can take to live a happier life with much less regret.

Managing these feelings of anger is essential if we want to live a more peaceful, happy, and guilt-free life. Uncomfortable feelings can wreak havoc in our daily lives and especially that all-too-familiar feeling of anger. When anger rears its ugly head, it can sometimes be difficult to control. Before you realize it, words come out of your mouth that you never would have said if you weren't angry. So, learning new skills and techniques to manage your anger gives you a greater sense of control and will, in turn, help you to feel less stressed and happier.

It may seem that, in the moment of a heated conversation, you really don't care about what you are saying to the other person; but that's most likely not true. If you are reading this article and have ever regretted anything you have said to yourself or another person, you're definitely ready to learn and practice the skills that will support you in living a regret-free life. The first step in implementing a new way to handle tense conversations and upsetting situations is to understand the reasons that you feel angry in the first place.

Discover What's Under All that Anger

Throughout our lifetime, we create our own beliefs in relation to ourselves and others. Many of these beliefs create limits on what we can achieve in our lives. Undiscovered limiting beliefs like these can unintentionally make us angry and cause us to say things we later regret. You can overcome these limitations by knowing three things:

To begin with, it is important to understand what limiting beliefs are and how they generate our present view of the world. After that, learning to quickly notice when these limiting beliefs are starting to take control is essential. Finally, we want to make conscious plans for how we respond in these situations, so that our limiting beliefs take a backseat and we are back at the wheel.

If you don't take the time to follow these steps, you will keep repeating the same reactions without ever figuring out why.

Because blowing up in anger is a knee-jerk reaction, we usually don't have enough time to stop and accurately observe the situation. How does this happen? Typically, our anger begins to get stimulated when we believe a situation should be going differently, or when our unconscious beliefs about the world began to take over. Usually it is some combination of the two.

How do I become aware of a belief that is limiting me?

The core beliefs that limit people usually sound something like, "I don't matter and people are selfish," or "I'm incompetent and people want too much of me," or "I have no control of my life and people can't be trusted.' It could even be a combination of these statements, or other similar ones. We have each invented our own individual spins on this topic.

We have never met anyone who can honestly say that they have no limiting beliefs. This is not a bad thing and we want to make it clear that were not saying limiting beliefs are wrong and need to be fixed. You don't even need to know why they came into existence. Beliefs are only beliefs and all you need to do is become conscious of them and then choose how to respond.

There is good news, and it's that a belief is just something you think about over and over and over again. All you really need to do is begin thinking of things that are different. The easiest way to do this is to become conscious of your limiting beliefs so that you can cease being controlled by them and start creating the things you want in your life.

There are numerous reasons for why people act the way they do and it would be impossible to cover them all in one article. This article will provide some valuable advice for how to slow down and gather your thoughts before talking. Here are some 'how-to's' that will help:

To start, it is very important to have a clear understanding of how we initially create limiting beliefs. Our video, 'How to Reclaim Your Authentic Happiness," will show you how early life experiences are often poorly understood and can become the beginnings of our limiting beliefs. Over time, these thought patterns become habits deeply ingrained into our lives. Long after we have forgotten the triggering events, we still react based on the beliefs that are created.

Secondly, it's essential to have clarity about what you most value. On our website, we offer a free values exercise that can help you determine what is most important to you and the critical elements you need in order for you to be happy. After doing this exercise, any time you get upset, you can ask yourself if you are living in harmony with what you value. If you aren't, decide what actions you can take that would be in harmony with those values.

Third, we suggest that you start identifying the specific thoughts you are having when you first start feeling upset--before it turns to anger. Start noticing how your body feels at those times. Where do the sensations first start to happen? Describe the earliest sensations you notice and get familiar with them.

Anger isn't an emotion you just want to suppress, and we want to be very clear about saying that anger isn't a "bad thing.' When anger is understood, it can be a supportive guide toward your undiscovered values or the qualities in your life that are most important to you. Use your anger and other uncomfortable feelings to remind yourself that what you value is missing in the situation. Let them guide you to actions that will support you in having the life you want. Therefore, rather than wasting your energy trying to suppress your anger, learn to use it to your own advantage.

If you sometimes say things you regret and want more happiness and the keys to a satisfying life, learning to escape the bonds of limiting beliefs is a great first step. Start by signing up for our free thought-provoking, motivational Weekly Action Tips eMail series at: http://www.FocusedAttention.com/cmd.php?ad=317928. Each tip offers practical advice for creating and living the life you really want. Or visit us at: http://www.FocusedAttention.com